Do nambar ka Badmaas
By Prem Guru
“Ye sab choote, Gaand aur Lund kaamdev ke haathon ki katputaliaan hai. Kaun si choot aur gaand kis lund se, kab, kahaan, kaise, kitani der chudegi koi nahi janata” Isi kahani me se…
Bachpan me Jab bhi joron ki baarish hoti ya jor ki Bijali kadakati thee to main dar ke maare ghar me dubak jaaya karata tha. Par us raat ki baaris ne to mujhe romanch se labalab bhar diya tha. Aaj bhi jab joron ki baaris hoti hai aur bijali kadakati hai mujhe ek sher yaad aa jata hai :
Ai khuda itana na baras ki vo aa na paayen
Aane ke baad itana baras ki vo jaa na paayen
June mahine ke aakhiree din chal rahe the. Madhu (meri patani Madhur) garmiyon ki chhutiyon me apne maike gai hui thi. Main akela drawing room me khidaki ke paas baitha Mikki ke baare me hi soch raha tha. (Mikki mere saale ki ladaki umar 13 saal jiski kahani maine aapko ‘Teesara chumman’ me sunaai thi). Pichhale saal uska ek rod accident hua tha aur wo ham sab ko rota bilakhata chhod kar chali gai thi. Sach poocho to pichhale ek dedh saal me koi din aisa nahi beeta hoga ki maine Mikki ko yaad nahi kiya ho. Wo to mera sab kuch jaise loot kar hi le gai thi. Main uski wohi penti aur reshami rumaal haathon me liye baitha uski yaad me aansu baha raha tha. Har aahat par main chonk sa jaata aur lagata ki jaise Mikki hi aa gayi hai
Darwaaje par jab bhee koi aahat si hotee hai to lagata hai ki tum aayi ho
Taaron bhari raat me jab koi juganu chamakata hai lagata hai tun aayi ho
Umas bhari garmee me jab purwa ka jhonka aata hai to lagata hai tum aayi ho
Door kaheen amraai me jab bhi koi koyal kookati hai lagata hai ki tum aayi ho
Aaj Sunday ka din tha. Saare din ghar par hi raha. Kal jo baazar se blu filmo ki 4-5 CD laaya tha unko computer me copy kiya tha. Ek do filme dekhi bhi par Mikki ki yaad aate hi maine computer band kar diya. Din me garmee itani jyaada ki aag hi baras rahi thi. Raat ke koi 10 baje honge. Achaanak mausam badala aur jor ki aandhi ke saath halaki baaris shuru ho gai. Hawa ke ek thande jhonke ne mujhe jaise sahala sa diya. Achaanak caal bel bajee aur lagbhag darwaaja peetate hue koi bola “Didi .. jijju darwaaja jaladi kholo didi…?” kisi ladaki ki aawaaj thi.
Mikki jaisi awaaj sunkar main jaise apne khayaalo se jaaga. Is samay kaun ho sakata hai ? Maine Rumaal aur penti apni jeb me daali aur jaise hee darwaaje ki or badha ek jhatake ke saath darwaaja khula aur koi mujh se jor se takaraya. Shayad chitakani khuli hi rah gai thi darwaaja peetane aur jor lagaane ke kaaran apne aap khul gaya aur hadbadaahat me wo mujhse takara gai. Agar maine use baahon me nahi thaam liya hota to nischit hi neeche gir padati. Is aapa dhaapi me uske kandhe se lataka bag (Lap top waala) neeche gir hi gaya. Wo cheekhati hui mujhse jor se lipat si gai. Uske badan se aati paseene, baaris aur jawaan jism ki khusboo se mera tan man sab saraabor hota chala gaya. Uske chhote chhote uroj mere seene se sate hue the. Wo roye jaa rahi thai. Main hakka bakka khada rah gaya kuchh samajh hi nahi paaya.
Koi 2-3 minat ke baad mere munh se nikala “kk…kaun.. aare.. Nnnn.. niii. Nisha tu… ??? Kya baat hai … aare kya hua.. tum itani dari hui kyon ho” oh ye to Madhu ki kajin Nisha thi. Kabhi kabhaar apne job ke silsile me yahaan aaya karti thi aur raat ko yahi thahar jaati thi. Pahale maine is chidiya par dhyaan hi nahi diya tha. Aap jarioor soch rahe honge itani mast haseen laundia ki or mera dhyaan pahale kyon nahi gaya. Iske do kaaran the. Ek to wo sardiyon me ek do baar jab aai thi to wo kapado se ladi fadi thi doosare uski aankhon par mota sa chashmaa. Aaj to wo kamaal ki lag rahi thi. Usne contect lense laga liye the. Kandho ke upar tak baal kate hue. Kaano me sone ki patali baaliyaan. Jeen pent me kase nitamb aur khule top se jhalakate kandhaari aanar to kahar hi dha rahe the. Saali apne aap ko Jhansi ki sherani kahati hai par lagati hai Nanitaal ya Almoda ki pahaadi billi.
“Oh… sorry jijju… Madhu didi kahaan hai ? …didi…didi…” Nisha mujh se pare hatate hue idhar udhar dekhate hue boli
“Oh didi ko chhodo pahale ye bataao tum itani raat gaye baaris me dari hui kya baat hai ??”
“wo.. wo ek kutta…”
“Haan haan kya hua tum theek to ho ?”
Nisha abhi bhi dari hui khadi thi. Uske munh se kuch nahi nikal raha tha. Maine darwaaja band kiya aur uska haath pakad kar sofe par baithaaya fir poochha “Kya baat hui tum ro kyon rahi thi ?”
Jab uski saanse kuch normal hui to wo boli “Darashal saaree musibat aaj hi aani thi. Pahale to prajenteson me hi der ho gai thi aur fir khaana khane ke chakkar 9 baj gaye. Car bhi aaj hi kaharaab honi thi. Bus stand gai to me Agara ki bas bhi mis ho gai” shaayad in dino uski posting Aagara me thi.
Main itana to jaanata tha ki wo kisi nai medicin banane waali company me kaam karati hai aur maarketing ke silsile me kai jagah aati jaati rahati hai par is tarah dare hue rote hue hadbada kar aane ka kaaran mere samajh nahi aaya. Maine sawaaliya nigaahon se use dekha to wo boli
“Actually Maharaaja Hotel me hamaari company ka ek prajenteson tha. Saare medical reprajentetivas aaye hue the. Hamaare do naye products bhi laanch kiye gaye the. Confrence 9 baje khatam hui aur khaana khane ke chakkar me deri ho gai aur waapas ghar jaane ka saadhan nahi tha. Yahaa aate samay raaste me auto kharaab ho gaya. Is baaris ko bhi aaj hi aana tha. Raaste me aapke ghar ke saamne ek kutta soya tha bekhayaali me mera pair uske upar pad gaya aur wo itani jor se bhonka ki main dar hi gai” Ek saans me Nisha ne sab bata diya
“Aare kahin kaat to nahi liya ?”
“Nahi kaata to nahi… Didi dikhaai nahi de rahi?”
“Oh.. Madhu to Jaipur gai hui hai pichhale 10 dino se”
“Tabhi unka mobile nahi mil raha tha.”
“To mujhe hi kar liya hota”
“Mere paas aapka nambar nahi tha.”
“Haan bhai aap haamara nambar kyon rakhengi… hum aapke hai kaun ?”
“Aap aisa kyon kahate hain ?”
“Bhai tum to didi ke liye hi aati ho hamen kaun poochhata hai ?”
“Nahi aisi koi baat nahi hai”
“Iska matalab tum mere liye bhi aati ho” main bhala mazaak ka aisa sunahara mauka kaise chhodata. Wo sarama gai. Usne apni nigaahen neechi kar li. Thodi der kuchh sochati rahi fir boli “oh didi to hai nahi main kisi hotal me hi thahar jaati hun ?”
“Kyon yahaan koi dikatt hai ?”
“Wo.. wo.. aap akele hai aur main… mera matalab… didi ko pata chalega to kya sochengi ?”
“Kyon kya sochengi kya tum is se pahele yahaan nahi thahari ?”
“Oh par us samay didi ghar par thi”
“Kya hum itane bure hai ?”
“Oh wo baat nai”
“To fir kya baat hai ?”
“Wo wo.. mera matalab kya ek jawaan ladaki ka is tarah ek gair (paraaye) mard ke saath raat me … akele ?? mera matalab ?? oh kuch samajh nahi aa raha” usne roni si surat banaate hue kaha
“Oh ab main samajha tum mujhe gair samajhati ho ya fir tumhe apane aap par viswaas nahi hai”
“Nahi aisi baat to nahi hai”
“To fir baat ye hai ki main ek hinsak pashu hun ek gunda badmas mavaali hun tum jaisee akeli ladaki ko paakar tumhe khaa hi jaaung ya kuchh ulata seedha kar baithunga? Kyun hai na yahi baat ?”
“Oh jijju aap bhi baat ka batangad bana rahe hai. Main to ye kah rahi thi aapko bekaar pareshaani hogi”
“Aare isame pareshaani waali kya baat hai”
“Fir bhi Ekata kapoor … mera matalab wo…didi…?” wo kuchh sochate hue si boli
“Aare jab tumhe koi probalam nahi mhjuhe nahi to fir Jaipur baithi Madhu ko kya problam ho sakati hai. Aur fir aas pados waale kisi ki koi fikar nahi karate hai. Agar apna man saaf hai to fir kisi ka kya dar ? kya main galat kah raha hun ?” Maine kaha. Main itana badhiya mauka aur haath aai murgi ko aise hi hawa me kaise ud jaane deta.
Mujhe to laga jaise Mikki hi mere paas sofe par baithi hai. Wohi naak naks, wohi roop rang aur kadkathi, wo hi aawaaj wohi naazuk sa badan bilkul chhuimui si kacchi kali jaisi. Bas dono me fark itana tha ki Nisha ki aankhen kaali hai aur Mikki ki billori thi. Dusara Nisha koi 24-25 ki hogi jabaki Mukki 13 ki thi. Mikki thodi si gadrayee hui lagati thi jabki Nisha slim trim lagati hai. Kamar to aisi ki dono mutthion me hi sama jaaye. Chhote chhote raskoop (uroj). Honth itane surkh laal mote mote hai to uske nichale honth mera matlab hai ki uski bur ke honth kaise honge main to soch kar hi romaanchit ho utha. Mera pappu to chhalaangen hi lagaane laga. Uske honthon ke dahaane (chodaai) to 2.5-3 inch se jyaada katai nahi the. Isaka matalab uski bur ka cheera bhi jyaada se jyaada 2.5-3 inch ka hi hoga. He Ling Mahadev agar aaj ye chidia fas gai to meri to laatari hi lag jaayegee. Aur agar aisa ho gaya to kal somwaar ko main jaroor jal aur doodh tumhe chadhaaunga bhale hi mujhe kal chutti hi kyon na karani pade. Pakka promise.
Prem Aashram waale Guruji ne apne pichhale vishesh pravachan me sach hi farmaaya tha “Ye sab choote, Gaand aur Lund kaamdev ke haathon ki katputaliaan hai. Kaun si choot aur gaand kis lund se, kab, kahaan, kaise, kitani der chudegi koi nahi janata”
Itane me jor ki bijalee kadaki aur moosalaadhaar baaris shuroo ho gai. Nisha dar ke maare meri or sarak aayi. Mujhe ek sher yaad aa gaya :
Lipat jaate hai wo bijalee ke dar se
ya ilaahi ye ghata do din to barase
Uske bheege badan ki khusboo se main to madhosh hi hua jaa raha tha. Geele kapado me uska ang ang saaf dikh raha tha. Shayaad usne mujhe ghoorate hue dekh liya tha. Wo kuch sochate hue boli “Main to poori hi bheeg gai”
Main samajh gaya wo kapade badalana ya nahaana chaahati hai par uske paas kapade nahi hai mere se kapade maangate hue shaayad kuchh sankoch kar rahi hai maine use kaha “Koi baat nahi tum naha lo main Madhu ki saadi kapade nikaal deta hun”
Wo fir sochane lagi “Par wo .. wo.. saadi to mujhe baandhani nahi aati. Maine man me kaha ‘Meri jaan tum to bina saadi aur kapado ke hi achhi lagogi tumhe kapade kaun kambakth pahanaana chaahata hai’ par maine kaha.
“Koi baat nahi koi pent aur Top shirt ya naaity vagerah bhee hai aao mere saath” maine uska baaju pakada aur apne bedroom ki or le jaane laga. Ahh…. uski naram naazuk baahen makhamal jaisi mulaayam chikani. Agar baahen aisi chikani hai to fir jaanghe kaisee hongi ?
Kapado ki Aalmaari to saadion se ladi padi thi. Ek khaane me kuch pent shirt tops aadi bhi the. Maine unki or isaara kar diya. Nisha ne kaha par meri kamar to 22” ki hai Madhu didi ki pent mujhe dheelee rahegi ?”
“Oh… achha koi baat nahi mere paas ek dress aur hai tumahe poori aani chaahiye aao mere saath” maine aalmaari band kar dee aur doosari aalmaari ki or le jaakar use gulaabi rang ki ek nayi bel bottam aur halake green rang ka top jis par peele phool bane the dikhaaya saath ek joda bra aur penti ka bhi tha. Ye maine Mikki ke pichhale janam din ke liye Madhu se chhupa kar khareede the par Mikki ko de nahi paaya tha. Unhe dekhkar Nisha ne kaha “Lagata hai ye to aa jaayenge”
Usne penti uthaai aur gaur se dekhate hue boli “Oh.. Didi bhi aisi hee bra penti pahanti hai ? ye to ye … to oh ?” wo aage kuchh nahi bol paai be-khayaali me uske munh se nikal to gaya par uska matalab jaan kar wo sarama gai. Isssss…. Mujhe to laga jaise kisi ne Mikki ko hi mere saamne khada kar diya hai bas naam ka hi fark hai. Mikki ki tarah sharamane ki is jaan lewa ada ko to main jindagee bhar nahi bhool paaunga.
Na jaane kya soch kar usne bra aur penti wahin rakh di. Mera dil to chhalaange hi lagane laga. Ya allah…. bina bra aur penti me to ye bilkul Mikki ki tarah kayaamat hi lagegi main apne aap par kaaboo kaise rakh paaunga. Mujhe to dar lagane laga ki kaheen main uska balaatkar hi na kar baithun. Mera pappu to jaise kutub meenaar ban gaya tha. Itani uttejana to aaj se pahale kabhi nahi mahsoos hui thi. Pappu to adiyal Tattu hi ban gaya tha. Achaanak mere kaano me Nisha ki meethi aawaj padi
“Oh jijju main nahaane jaa rahi hun”
“Haan haan toliya aur sampoo aadi baathroom me hain.” main to khayaalo se jaise jaaga..
Nisha baathroom me ghus gai. Mera dil jor jor se dhadak raha tha. Baahar jor ki baaris aur mere andar jalati aag dono ki raftaar ek jaisi hi to thi. Achaanak mere deemag me ek khayaal daud gaya aur honthon par ek rahasyamai muskaan. Aur uske saath hi mere kadam bhi baathroom ki or badh gaye. Ab aap itane kam akal (bevkoof) to nahi hai ki mera plan na samajhe hon.
Maine kee hol se baathroom ke andar jhaanka…...
Nisha ne apni pent aur shart utaar di thi. Ab wo sirf bra penti me thi. Uff.. kya mast hirani jaisi gori chitti naazuk kamsin kali tarah jaise Mikki hi meri ankhon ke saamane khadi ho. Suraahi daar gardan, patali si kamar maano limka ki botal ko ek joda haath aur pair laga diye hon. Sangemarmar sa tarasha hua safaak badan kisi fariste ka bhi imaan dol jaye. Ek khaas baat : Kankh (jahaan se baahen suru hoti hai) aur urojon se thoda upar ka bhaag aise bana tha jaise ek gori chitti choot hi bani hai. Aisi ladkiaan waakai naazuk hoti hai aur unki asali choot bhi aisi hi hoti hai. Chhoti si tikone aakaar ki maachis ki dibbi jitani badi. Agar aapne Priyanka chopra ya Kareena kapoor ko kisi film me sleev less blaause pahane dekha ho to aapko meri is baat ki sachaai ka andaza ho jaayega. Fir mera dhyaan uski kamar par gaya jo 22 inch se jyaada to hargij nahi ho sakati. Patali patali gori gulaabi jaanghen. Aur do inch patti waali wo hi T shep ki penti (jo Madhu ki fevret hain). Unke baahar jhaankate chote chote mulaayam royen jaise baal unhen jhaant to katai nahi kaha jaa sakata. He bhagwaan main to jaise paagal hi ho jaaunga. Mujhe to lagane laga ki main abhi baathroom ka darwaaja tod kar andar ghus jaaunga aur…. aur…..
Nisha ne bade naaz-o-andaaj se apni bra ke hook khole aur dono kabutar jaise aazaad ho gaye. Gore gulaabi do sinduri aamo ho jaise ras se bhare hue. Aerola karam ki goti jitana bada bilkul churt laal. Nippal to bas chane ke daane jitane. Surkh ratnaar anaar ke daaane jaisi pencil ki nok ki tarah teekhe. Usne ada se apne urojon par haath fera aur ek daane ko pakad kar munh ki taraf kiya aue uspar jeebh laga di. Yaaaa allaaa…. mujhe laga jaise ab kayaamat aa hi jaayegi. Usne sheese ke saamane ghoom kar apne nitamb dekhe. Jaise do poonam ke chaand kisi ne baandh diye hon. Aur unke beech ki daraar ek lambi khaai ki tarah. Penti us daraar me ghusi hui thi. Usne apne nitambon par ek halaki si chapat (thapki) lagaai aur fir dono haathon ko kamar ki or le jaakar apni kaali penti neeche sarkaani shuroo kar dee…..
Mujhe laga ki agar maine apni neegaahen wahaan se nahi hataai to aaj jaroor mera hart fel ho jaayega. Jaise hi penti neeche saraki halake halake makka ke bhutte ke baalon jaise reshmi naram chhote chhote royen jaise baal nazar aane lage. Uske baad do bhaago me bate mote mote baahari honth gulaabi rangat liye hue. Cheera to mere andaaj ke mutaabik 3 inch se to katai jyaada nahi tha. Andar ke honth baadaami rang ke. Lagata hai saali ne abhi tak is choot (maaf karen bur) se shirf mootane ka hi kaam liya hai. Koi angul baaji bhi lagata hai nahi ki hogi. Andar ke honth bilkul chipake hue aalingan badhh. Aur kismis ka daana to bas moti ki tarah chamak raha tha. Gaand ka chhed to nazar nahi aaya par mera andaaja hai ki wo bhi bhure rang ka hi hoga aur ek chavanni ke sikke se jyaada bada kya hoga. Daayin jaangh par ek chhota sa til. Ufff…. Kayaamat barpaata. Usne sheeshe me dekhate hue un reshami baalon waali bur par ek haath fera aur halaki si seetee bajaate hue ek aankh daba di. Mera pappu to aise akad gaya jaise kisi General ko dekhkar koi sipaahi attensan ho jaata hai. Mujhe to dar lagane laga ki kahin ye bina ladaai kiye hi shaheed na ho jaaye. Maine pyaar se use sahalaaya par wo mera kaha bhala kyon maanata.
Aur fir nazakat se wo halake halake paaon badhaate hue shaawar ki or badh gai. Paani ki fuhaar uske gore badan par pet se hoti hui uski bur ke chhote chhote baalo se hoti hui neeche gir rahi thi jaise ki wo peshaab hi kar rahi ho. Main to munh baaye use be-saakhata dekhata hi rah gaya.
Wo gaati ja rahi thi “Paani me jale mera gora badan” main soch raha tha aaj ise thanda main kar hi dunga ghabraao mat. Koi 10 minat tak wo fawaare ke neeche khadi rahi fir usne apani bur ko paani se dhoya. Usne apni angulion se apni faanke dheere se chodi ki jaise kisi titali ne apne pankh uthaaye hon. Gulaabi rang ki naazuk si pankhudiyaan. Kismis ke dane jitani badi madan mani (teent) maachis ki tilli jitana mutra chhed aur uske ek inch neeche swarg ka dwaar chhota sa laal ratnaar. Mujhe laga main to gas khaa kar gir hi padunga.
Usne shaawar band kar diya aur toliye se shareer ponchhane lagi. Jab wo apne nitamb ponch rahi thi. Ek halaki si jhalak uski narm naazuk gaand ke chhed par bhi pad hi gai. Ufff… Kya kayaamat chhupaa rakhi hai usne. Apni bagale ponchhane ke liye jab usne apni baahen uthaai to main dekh kar dang rah gaya. Kankh me ek bhi baal nahi bilkul makkhan jaisi chikani saaf suthari gori chatt. Ab main use husn kahun, bijali kahun, pataka kahun ya kayamat…..
Arash Malsiyaani ka ek sher to kahe bina nahi raha ja raha :
Bala hai kahar hai aafat hai fitana hai kayaamat hai
In Haseeno ki jawaani ko jawaani kaun kahataa hai ?
Ab usne bina bra aur penti ke hi shirt (Top) aur salex pahanana chaalu kar diya. Bel bottam pahante samay maine ek baar fir uski choot par najar daali. Laal chukandar jitani chhoti si pyaari si choot jaise Mikki ka hi dabal rol ho. Ab wahaan rukane ka koi matalab nahi rah gaya tha. He bhole shankar aaj meri laaj rakh lena kal somwaar hai yaad hai na ????....
Main sofe par baith gaya. Jaise hi baathroom ka darwaaja khula geele baalo se tapakati shabnam jaisi boonde, kaampate honth, kamsin badan, skin tight salex (bel bottam) me kasi patali patali jaanghon ke beech fasi bur ka itihaas aur bhugol yaane cheera aur faanken saaf mahsoos ho rahi thi. He bhagwaan kya fuljhadi hai pataka hai ya ki koi bomb hai. Ek jaadui roshani se jaise poora draawing room hi bhar utha. Achaanak ek baar jor ki bijali kadaki aur ek tej dhamaake ke saath poore mohalle ki laait (light) chali gai. Haal me ghupp andhera chhaa gaya. Uske saath hi dar ke maare Nisha ki ek cheenkh si nikal gai “Jijju ye kya hua” wo lagbhag daudati hui fir meri or aai. Is baar wo takaraai to nahi par uski garam saanse main apne paas jaroor mahasoos kar raha tha.
“Lagata hai kaheen short sarkit ho gaya hai tum daro mat yahee thaharo main invartar chaaloo karata hun” Maine get ke paas laga invartar ka batan chaaloo kiya to hamaare bed room aur study room ki tub light jal uthi.
“He bhagwaan sab kuch ulata seedha aaj hi hona hai kya ?” Nisha ruwaanse swar me boli
“Kyon kya hua ?”
“”Ab dekho na light bhi chali gai” usne ek thandi saans lee.
“Par bed room me to light hai na”
“Par mujhe to kal ke workshop me prajenteson ke liya project work karana tha aur mere Laptop ko bhi aaj hi kharaab hona tha. He bhagwaan….”
“Koi baat nahi tum study room me rakhe computar se kaam chala sakati ho” maine poochha “Kitana kaam hai”
“Ghanta bhar to lag hi jaayega. Achhi musibat hai. Main bhi kahaan fas gai is campany me.”
“Kyon kya hua”
“Ab dekho na roj roj ka prajenteson, meetings, warkshop, SWOT analysis, product laanching jhamele hi jhamele hai is nanhi si jaan par”
Maine apne man me kaha ‘meri jaan ham jaise kisi aashiq ka daaman thaam lo saare project poore kar dega’ par maine kaha “Kaun se product laanch kar rahi ho ?”
“Do product hain ek to pregnancy rokane ki pills hai shirf maheene me ek goli aur doosaree bacchon ke angutha choosane aur daanton se naakhoon kaatane ki aadat se chhutakaara dilaane ki dawaai hai jise naakhoono par lagaaya jaata hai”
“He bhagwaan tum sab log hamaari roji roti chheen lene par tule ho”
“Kya matalab ?? hum to bijanas (business) ke saath saath samaaj sewa bhi kar rahe hai” Nisha ne hairaani se poochha wo baat baat me ‘kya matalab’ jaroor bolati hai
“Aare bhai saaf baat hai tum pragnancy rokane ki dawaa ki maarketing karati ho to bacche kahaan se paida honge aur fir hamaare product jaise baby milk, baby food, baby oil, nappeej, paaudar, soaps kaun khareedega ?”
“aur wo angutha chusane ki aadat chhudaane ki dawaai ?”
“Wo bhi hum jaise premion ke upar atyaachaar hi hai”
“Kya… mat..… lab…?” Nisha mera munh dekhane lagi.
“Shaadi ke baad wo aadat apne aap chhoot jaati hai… uski jarurat hi nahi padati shadi ke baad bhala kaun use angutha choosane deta hai…” maine hansate hue kaha
Pahale to meri baat use samajh hi nahi aayi lakin baad me to wo itane jor se sarmaai ki poochho mat usne mujhe ek dhakka sa dete hue kaha “Jijju tum ek nambar ke badmaas ho”
“Nahi main do nambar ka badmaas hun” Main khilkhila kar hans pada.
“Jijju majaak chhodo mujhe apna project poora karana hai computer kahaan hai ?”
“Haan chalo mujhe bhi apana project banana hai”
“Aare aapko kaun sa project banana hai ?”
“Aare tum nahi jaanati mujhe ek nahi poore 5 projects par kaam karana hai” Ab main use kya batata ki ‘mujhe tumhaara doodh peena hai, bur chaatani hai, apna Land chuswaana hai, chudaai karani hai aur gaand bhi maarani hai’. Ho gaye na poore 5 project.’
“Oh.. par aapke liye to ye maamuli si baat hai aap to bade anubhavi hai aap to jhat se prograam bana hi lenge” wo bhala mere in naye products ke baare me abhi kya jaanati thi.
“Haan wo to theek hai par mere paas bhi samay kam bacha hai kewal 2 ghante aur poore 5 prooject… khair chhodo campaleet kar hi loonga mujhe apne aap par poora bharoshaa hai aao study room me tumhe computar bata deta hun” aur fir hum dono study room me aa gaye.
Computer chaalu karane ke baad usne pen draaive (Data storage equipment) nikaala aur use computar me neeche bane chhed me daalane ki kosis ki par wo andar nahi gaya.
“Jijju ye is chhed me andar kyon nahi jaa raha ?”
“Aare pichhale waale chhed me daalo usme aaraam se chala jaayega” usne meri or thode gusse se dekha to maine kaha “Aare bhai ye chhed kharaab hai iske peeche ek aur chhed hai usme… wo sahi hai tum majaak samajh rahi ho” maine hansate hue kaha
“Aap mera Lap top chek kar do na pleej” meri baat kaatate hue Nisha boli
“Laao main dekh deta hun kya problam hai” main Lap top lekar apne bed room me aa gaya. Bed room me pahunch kar maine apne project ke upar kaam karana shuroo kar diya. Is Nisha (Raat) ko kaise Raat ki raani banana hai. Mujhe to uski choot ke saath saath gaand bhi maarani hai aur use lund bhi chusawaana hai. Sabse badi baat to use sex ke liye tayyar karana hi muskil hai. Samay kam aur mukaabala sakth. Khair Muhabbat-e--marada madad-e-khuda.
Simaran (meri class met) ko chodane me mujhe poore do saal lag gaye the. Anaarkali ki chudaai me do mahine, Sudha ki chudaai me do hafte aur Mikki ki chudaai ke prograam me do din hi lage the. Par Nisha ko chudai aur gaand marwaane ke liye tayyar karane me to mere paas shirf do ghante hi hai. Aaj Prem Guru ka asali imatihaan hai. Perfect prograaming karani hogi jara si galati poore project ko kharaab kar degi aur ye nai chidiya mere haathon se nikal bhaagegi. Par main aisa kadaapi nahi hone dunga. Aakhir mujhe Prem Guru aise hi to nahi kahate hai.
Lap top me vaairas (virus) tha aur sistam (window Systam) ki do faail (files) karapt thi. Ye to mere baayen haath ka khel tha. Par maine ise abhi theek nahi kiya. Maine uske beg ko check kiya. Usame dawaaiyon ke sampals, papers aur mack-up ka chhota mota saamaan tha. Maine boroleen jaisi khusboo waali creem ki tube, vasaline ki dibbi, ek chhota sa sheesha aur napkin nikaal kar sirhaane ke neeche rakh liye.
Ab mujhe apne project ki perfect plaaning ke baare me sochana tha. Do teen aaltarnetive bhi rakhane the. Cantinjency prograam banana tha. Strangth, weakness, opprtunity, threats (SWOT) sab dhyaan me rakh kar prograam shuroo karana tha. Maine kai opsons par vichaar kiya aur fir sab kuchh apne deemaag me set kar ke flow chaart banaane laga. Mujhe chudaai ke is prograam ko 3 charano me poora karana tha.
Maine ek baar study room ki or jaakar dekha. Nisha computer par lagi thi. Koi 40 minat to beet hi gaye the. Nisha ka prograam khatam hone hi waala hoga. Maine usase poochha ki kitana samay aur lagega to usne bataya ki koi 15-20 minat aur lagege. Maine draawar se sistam ki CD lee aur waapas bed room me aa gaya. Maine files reload kar dee aur viras scan chala diya. Computer on ho gaya. Is kaam me 10-15 minat lage. Jab main CD waapas rakhane study room me gaya to Nisha sistam band hi karane jaa rahi thi. Main darwaaje ke baahar hi ruk kar andar dekhane laga. Usne start menu par clik kiya. Sistam off karane waale batan par mouse clik karne ki bajaaya ‘Recent document’ par clik kar diya. Meri aankhen chamakane lagi. Fir usne upar se neeche tak files dekhee. Uski neegaahen AVSEQ01, 02 (Jangali Billi aur black fox) par padi. Usne ulata clik kiya aur file ka source dekha. Agar aap thoda bahut computer jaanate ho to pata hoga ye Vidio ki files thee. Aare wohi jo maine aaj subah computar par copi ki thi aur 2-3 dekhi bhi thi. Is file par clik karate hi film chaalu ho gai. Mera kaam ho gaya tha. Main jhat se ulate paaon waapas bed room ki or bhagaa.
Aap shaayad soch rahe honge ab waapas aane ka nahi saali ko patak kar chodane ka time tha. Aap galat soch rahe hai. Main koi jor jabardasti me viswaas nahi rakhata hun. Main to Prem ka Pujaari hun. Maine ab tak jitani bhi choot ya gaand maari hai wo sabhi apne dono haathon me jaise apni choot aur gaand lekar mere paas aai hai. Main use bhi isi tarah chodana chaahata tha. Main use itana garam kar dena chaahata tha ki wo khud chala kar mujhse choot aur gaand maarane ko kahe tabhi to asali chudaai ka maja hai. Kisi ko majboor karake chodana to bas paani nikalane waali baat hoti hai.
Mujhe pata tha saali film ke ek do seen hi dekhegee aur fir use band karke mere bed room me ye chek karane aayegee ki main kya kar raha jun. Koi dekh to nahi raha. Main bhi is maamale me pakka khilaadi hun. Main uske Lap Top ko theek karane ki poori acting kar raha tha. Wo chupake se aai aur ek nigaah daalate hue dabe paaon waapas chali gai. He ling Mahaadev tera laakh laakh dhanyawaad. Kaale habasi aur gori firangan ki gaand chudai aur ek 40 saal ki aunty ki ek 15-16 saal ke ladake ke saath chudaai dekhkar to meri Raat ki raani guljaar hi ho jaayegi. Mere prograam ka pahala charan safalata pooravak poora ho gaya tha.
Koi 25-30 minat ke baad Nisha bed room ki or aai. Uski aankhon me laal dore tair rahe the. Hosh ude hue chaal me ladkhadahat honth sukhe hue. Wo to bas itana hi bol paai “Jijju kya kar rahe ho” shaayad apni ukhadi saanso par kaabu paana chaahati thi.
“Bas tumhaara Lap top hi theek kar raha tha. Viras tha, Windo ki faaile karapt thi. Theek kar dee. Tumne intarnet par koi galat salat faail to nah kholi thi ?” maine poochha
Ab to uske chehare ka rang dekhane laayak tha.. “Nnn….nahi to”
“Koi baat nahi par tum itana ghabraai kyon ho ?”
“Wo… wo bijali kadak rahi hai na” ajeeb sanyog tha usi samay jor se bilali fir kadaki thi. Baahar ab bhi paani baras raha tha. Main jaanata tha wo kaun si bijali ki baat kar rahi hai. Wo mere paas aakar baith gai.
“Jijju sone ka kya karange ?” wo boli.
Maine man me socha ‘meri jaan tumhe sone kaun dega aaj ki raat’. Par maine kaha “Bhai bed pada hai so jaao”
“Yahaan ?”
“Kyon kya hua ?”
“Wo mera matalab hum dono ek kamare me ?”
“Main baahar so to jaata par bijali nahi hai aur guest room me jaharilee makadian aur machhar hai. Kabhi kabhi jangali billi bhi aa jaati hai. Bhai muje baahar dar lagata hai”
“Oh… ajeeb musibat me fas gai main to didi ko bhi aaj hi jaana tha”
“Isame musibat waali kaun si baat hai ? kya Madhu ko jangalee billion aur makadion ka dar nahi lagata ?”
“Wo… wo.. aisee baat nahi par .. aor.. wo.. ek kamare me ek hi bed par…?”
“Kyon apne aap par viswaas nahi hai kya ?”
“Nahi aisi baat nahi hai par .. wo ..wo”
“Chalo main neeche farsh par so jaata hun bhale hi mujhe neend aaye ya nahi koi baat nahi”
“On.. nahi main neeche main so jaaungi”
Maine man me socha ‘meri jaan neeche to tumhe sona hi padega par farsh par nahi mere neeche’. Meri plaaning bilkul pakki thi koi chook ka sawaal hi nahi tha. Maine usi bhole pan se kaha
“aare kyon hum Bharatpur waalon ki mehamaan nawaaji ko batta laga rahi ho. Achha ek kaam karate hai beech me ek takiya laga lete hai”
Wo meri baat par hans padi “Ek takiye se kya hoga”
“To do laga lete hai “ maine kaha. Wo kuchh soch rahi thee. Uske man ki uljhan main achhi tarah jaanata tha. “Oh.. abhi kaun si need aa rahi hai chalo chhodo koi aur baat karo” maine kaha
Ham dono bed par baith gaye. Main bed par tek lagaakar baitha tha aur Nisha mere saamane baithi thi. Pent me fasi uski choot ke aage ka bhaag karam ki goti jitani door me geela hua tha. Saali firanagan aur aunti ki chudaai dekh kar poori garam ho gai thi. Usne baat chaalu ki
“Jijju is naukaree se peechha chhutega ya nahi koi job chenj (badalane) ke chaanse hai ya nahi. Aap to haath dekh kar bata dete hai” Nisha ne haath aage badha diya. Maine jhat se uska haath pakad liya. Nisha pahale haath ki rekhaaon aur bhaagya aadi par viswaas nahi karati thi par jab se Madhu ki sangat me aai hai thoda bahut bhaagya aur sitaaron ko maanane lagi hai.
Uska Shukra Parvat to Sudha aur Mikki se bhi uncha tha. He bhagwaan aaj to tune meri laatari hi laga di. Uski hathali ke beech me til dekhkar maine kaha “Tumhaare haath me ye jo til hai uske hisaab se to tumhaare paas daulat ki koi kami nahi hai”
“Aare jijju aap bhi majaak karate hai. Kahaan hai mere paas daulat ?”
“Aare bhai haath ki rekhaaye to yahi kahati hai. Kya husn ki daulat kam hai tumhaare paas ?”
“Jijju aap bhi…” wo sarma gai. Iiiisss….. fir boli “Majaak chhodo koi dhang ki baat bataao na”
Maine usse poocha tumhaari umar kya hai to usne bataaya ki wo 24 ki hai.
“Kya tum bhi Madhu aur meri tarah mangalik jo ?”
“Haan kyon ?”
“Aare bhai mangalik ki saadi 24 ve saal me ho jaati hai”
“Par main to abhi 5-7 saal saadi nahi karungi”
“Bhai mangal to yahi kahata hai aur agle 3 saal me tum 2 baccho ki mummy bhi ban jaaogi”
“Jijju aap bhi ek nambar ke badmaas ho. Mazaak chhodo koi theek baat bataao na”
“Aare isme kya jhoot hai” usne apni aankjen tedhi kee to maine kaha “Achha chalo bataao tumhaare kitane boy frend hai ? kabhi unke saath film dekhati ho ya nahi ?”
“Nahi mera to koi boy frend nahi hai” usne aankhen tarerate hue kaha
“Aare fir is jawaani aur jindagi ka kya faayada. Main to ab bhi apni garl frend ko lekar film dekhata hu” Maine kaha
“Kya matalab ? kya aap ab bhi… mera matalab…?”
“Aare bhai meri garl frend to Madhu hi hai” Maine hansate hue kaha “Tum to jaanati ho main Madhu se kitana pyaar karata hun. Kai baar main aur Madhu film dekhane jaate hai to aisi acting karate hai ki jaise kolej (College) se bank maar kar aaye hon. Hame dekhkar to bade budhon ke dil par bhi saanp lotane lag jaate hai”
“Haan…. haan mujhe pata Madhu didi bataati hai tum to unke poore ‘Mitthu’ bane ho. Wo batati hai ki aap to shaadi ke itane saalo ke baad bhi unpar lattu hi bane ho” usne mera majaak udaate hue kaha
“Tum kaho to tumhaara bhi ‘Mitthu’ ban jaata hun”
“Main Jhansi ki Sherani hun aise kaabu nahi aaungi Mitthu ji ?” usne aankhen nachaate hue kaha. Maine man me soch ‘meri jaan aaj ki raat tum jaisi maina ke munh se hi bulwaaunga ‘bol meri mainaa Gangaaraam’ Fir maine kaha “Achha chalo bataao tumhaara vajan kitana hai”
“unnh… 48 k.g.”
“Mere hisaab se to 21 k.g. hona chaahiye”
“Kya matalab ?”
“Aare bahi very simpal dil ka 27 k.g. to hata hi do fir asali vajan to 21 k.g. hi raha na ?”
“To aap bhi maanate hai ki ham jhaansi waalo ka dil bada hota hai” usne chhaati taanate hue kaha. Sachmuch uske nippals kade ho rahe the.
“Dil bada nahi patthar ka hai”
“Kya matalab ?”
“Chalo wo baad me bataaunga” maine baat ko apne project ki or modana chaaha. “Dekho ye sab jyotish ke calculason hai. Kudarat ne sab cheeje apne hisaab se banaai hai. Sab cheejen ek sahi anupaat me hoti hai. unhe to maanana hi padega na ?”
“wo kaise ?”
“Ab dekho na bhagwaan ne hamaari naak hamaare anguthe jitani badi banaai hai” uene hairaani se apni naak par haath lagaaya aur meri or dekhane lagi
“Viswaas nahi hota to naap kar dekh lo” maine paas rakhi foota (scale) uski or kar di. Usne apna angutha naapa jo 7 c.m. nikala. Fir maine uski naak par foota rakh kar naap liya. Is dauraan main uske gaal chhoone se baaj nahi aaya. Kashmeeri seb hon jaise. Uski naak ka naap bhi 7 c.m. hi nikala. Fir maine kaha tumhaari madhyama (beech ki) anguli naapo. Jab usne naapi to wo 9 c.m. nikali. Ab maine usse kaha ab tum apne kaan ki lambaai naapo. Ye kaam to mujhe hi karaana tha. Is baar maine uska dusara gaal bhi chhoo liya. Kya mast mulaayam chikana sparsh tha. Saali ke gaal itane mast hai to boobs to kamaal ke honge. Khair kaan ka naap bhi 9 c.m, hona hi tha.
“Are ye to kamaal ho gaya? Wo hairaani se boli to maine kaha main bina naape tumhaari lambaai bhi bata sakata hun”
“Wo kaise ?”
“Tumhaare baaju (haath) ki lambaai ka dhaai guna hogi” usne meri or hairaani se dekha to maine kaha “Naap kar dekh lo”
Mere prograam ka flow chaart bilkul sahi disha me jaa raha tha. Ab uske naajuk santaron ki baari thi. Chidiya apne aap ko bada hoshiyaar samajhati hai. Par main bhi Prem Guru aise hi nahi hun. Maine foota uthaai aur dheele Top ke andar uski kankh se sata di. Wo kya bolati. Chup rahi. Uski kankh safa chat thi. Baalo ka naam nishaan nahi. Thodi si jhalak boobs par bhi pad gai. Ekdun sakth. Nippals tight. Gore gore. Allahbaadi amrood jaise.
Baaju ki lambaai 63 c.m. nikali. Maine kaha tumhaari lambaai 158 c.m. yaane ki 5 foot 3 inch ke aas paas hai”
“Oh very gud kamaal hai jijju” uski aankhen to fati ki fati hi rah gai. Wo fir boli “jijju job ka bhi bataao na” Main use prabhaavit karane me safal ho gya tha.
Ab progaam ke doosare bhaag ki antim laain (line) likhani thi. Maine kaha “ek aur baat hai upar ke honth aur neeche ke honth bhi bilkul ek samaan hote hai”
“Nahi ye galat hai neeche ka honth thoda mota hota hai. Mere honth jara dhyaan se dekho neeche ka mota hai ki nahi ?” Nisha apne munh (upar) waale hontho ki baat hi samajh rahi thi use kya pata main to choot ke honthon ki baat kar raha tha.
“Aare main munh ke hontho ki nahi doosare hontho ki baat kar raha tha. Achha chalo bataao aurten jyaada baaten kyon kaarati hai ?” maine poochha
“Kyon…?” usne aankhe tarerate hue poochha. wo ab meri baat ka matalab kuchh kuchh samajh rahi thi
“Aare bhai unke chaar honth hote hai na. Do upar aur do neeche ?” maine hansaate hue kaha
“Kya matalab…” uski nigaah jhat se apni choot ki or chali gai wahaan to ab choot ras ki baadh hi aa gai thi. Usne jhat se takiya apni god me rakh liya aur fir boli “oh jijju aakhir tum apani aukaat par aa hi gaye… mujhe tumse ab koi baat nahi karani. Akeli majboor ladaki jaankar use tang kar rahe ho. Mujhe need aa rahi hai.” Wo naaraaj si ho gai.
Pyaare paathako aur paathikaao mere prograam ka doosara charan poora ho gaya tha. Aap soch rahe honge bhala ye kya baat hui. Laundiya to naaraaj hokar sone jaa rahi hai ? Thoda sabar keejeeye abhi mera teesara charan poora kahaan hua hai.
Main jaanata tha saali poori garam hi chuki hai. Uski choot ne dana dan paani chhodana chaalu kar diya hai aur ab to paani ris kar uski gaand ko bhi tar kar raha hoga. Ab to bas Dilli do kadam door rah gai hai. Mera anubhav kahata hai is tarah ki baat ke baad ladaki itana jor se naaraaj hoti hai ki bawaal macha deti hai par Nisha to bas sone ki hi baat kar rahi hai. Maine baat aage badhaate hue kaha
“Aare tum bura maan gai… ye main nahi Prem aashram waale Guruji kahate hai. Achha chalo ab so hi jaaate hai. Par ek samasya hai ?”
“Wo kya ?”
“Darashal main sone se pahale doodh peeta hun”
“To kya probalam hai rasoi me jaakar pee lo”
“Wo… wo… rasoi me light nahi hai na. Bina light ke mujhe dar lagata hai”
“Aise to bade sher banate ho”
“Tum bhi to Jhaansi ki sherani ho tum hi la do na”
“Me… me… ” itane me jor ki biljali kadaki aur Nisha dar ke maare meri or khisak aai “Mujhe bhi andhare se dar lagata hai”
“He bhagwaan is pyaase ki koi madad nahi karana chaahata” maine tadafate hue majanu ki tarah jab sheene par haath rakh kar acting ki to Nisha ki hansi nikal gai
“Main kya madad kar sakati hun ?” usne hansate hue kaha
“Tum apana hi pila do”
“Kya matalab ?” usne jhat apne haath apne urojon par rakh liye “Jijju tum fir….?”
“Itane bade amrit kalaso me dooh bhara pada hai thoda sa pila do na tumhaara ky bigad jaayega” maine lagbahg gidgidaane ke andaaj me kaha to Nisha pahale to hans padi fir naaraaj hoti boli
“Jijju tun had paar kar rahe ho”
“Abhi paar kahaan ki hai tum kahaan paaar karane de rahi ho?”
“Jijju mujhe neend aa rahi hai’ usne aankhen tarerate hue kaha
“He bhagwaan kya jamaana aa gaya hai. Koi kisi ki madad nahi karana chaahata” Nisha hansate jaa rahi thi. Maine apni acting jaari rakhi “Suna hai Jhaansi ke logo ka dil bahut bada hota hai par ab pata chaala ki bada nahi patthar hota hai aur patthar hi kya poora pahaad hi hota hai tas se mas hi nahi hota pinghalata hi nahi.” Nisha hansate hansate dohari hoti jaa rahi thi. Par meri acting chaalu thi. “He bhagwaan in khoobsurat ladakion ka dil itana patthar ka kyon banaya hai is se achha to inhe kaali kaluti hi bana deta kam se kam kisi pyaase par tarah to aa jata” maine apni acting chaaloo rakhi.
Main to Sholley waala Veeru hi bana tha “Jab koi doodh ka pyaasa marata hai to agale janam me wo Kankhajura ya Cockaroch banata hai. He bhagwaan mujhe kankhujura ya cockaroch banane se bacha lo. He bhagwaan mujhe nahi to kam se kam is jhaansi ki raani ko hi bacha lo.”
“Kya matalab ?”
“Suna hai doodh ke pyaase marate vyakati ki bad dua se wo kanjoos ladaki agale janam me jangali billi banati hai. Aur is janam me uski shaadi 24 ve saal me hi ho jaati hai aur agle 3 saal me 6 bacche bhi ho jaate hai” maine aankhen band kiye apne dono haath upar uthaa diye.
Hansate hansate Nisha ka bura haal tha. Wo boli “3 saal me 6 bacche…….. wo kaise ?”
Mere prograam ki to ab bas chand laaine (lines) hi likhani baaki rah gai thi. Chidiya ne daana chugane ki liye jaal ki or badhana shuroo kar diya tha. Maine kaha “Aare sache aasiq ki dua ho aur bhagwaan ki marjee ho to sab kuch ho sakata hai. Har saal do do judawaa bacche paida ho sakate hai”
Nisha thahaaka maarane lagi thi. Hansate hansate wo doharee hoti ja rahi thi. Maine kaha chalo doodh nahi pilaana na sahi par to kam se kam ek baar doodh kalas dekh hi lene do”
“Dekhane se kya hoga ?”
“mujhe tassalee ho jayegi…ek jhalak dikhaane se tumhara kya ghis jaayega pleej ek baar “
“Oh… jijju tum bhi na… nahi… oh… tum bhi ek nambar ke badmaas ho mujhe apni baaton ke sabd jaal me fir uljhaa hi liya na mujhe tumse koi baat nahi karani hai”
“aare kisi ki pyaas bujhaane se punnya milata hai”
Nisha ab poori tarah garam ho chuki thi. Uske man me kasmakas chal rahi thi ki aage badhe ya nahi. Main jaanata hun pahalee baar ki chudaai se sabhi darati hai. Aur wo to abhi unchhui kanwaari kali thi. Par mera prograam bhi bilkul pafect tha. Mere changul se wo bhala kaise nikal sakati thi. Usne aankhen band kar rakhi thi.
Fir dheere se boli “Bas ek baar hi dekhana hai aur koi shaitaani nahi samajhe ?”
“Theek hai bas ek baar ek minat aur 20 sekind ke liye o.k. pakka promij.. sachi.. ” maine apne kaan pakad liye. Uski hansi nikal gai.
Dosto mere prograam ka teesara aur antim charan poora ho gaya tha. Mera dil jor jor se dhadak raha tha. Kamo besh yahi haalat Nisha ki bhi thi. Usanne kaanpati aawaaj me kaha “Achha pahale laait band karo mujhe sharm aati hai”
“Oh andhare me kya dikhaai dega ? aur fir wo jangali billi aa gai to ?”
“Oh.. jijju … tum bhi ….” Is baar usne ek nambar ka badmaas nahi kaha. Aur fir usne aankhen band kiye hue hi kaampate haathon se apna top thoda sa upar utha daya….
Ufff… sinduree aamo jaise do ras koop mere saamane the. Aerola koi karam ki goti jitana gulaabi rang ka. Nippals bilkul tane hue chane ke daane jitane. Main to bas mantra mugdh dekhata hi rah gaya. Mujhe laga jaise Mikki hi mere saamane baithi hai. Uske ras koop Mikki se thode se hi bade the par thode se neeche jhuke jabki Mikki ke bilkul sudol the. Maine ek haath se hole se unhe chhoo diya. Uff… kya mulaayam naajuk reshami ahsaas tha. Jaise hi maine unpar apni jeebh rakhi to Nisha ki ek meethi si sitkaar nikal gai.
“Oh jijju kewal dekhane ki baat hui thi…. Oh…. Oh… yaa…. ab… bas karo… mujh se nahi ruka jaayega….” Maine ek amrit kalas par jeebh rakh di aur use choosana chaalu kar diya. Nisha ki sitkaar ab bhi chaalu thi. “Oh… ji…juuuu.. mujhe kya kar diya hai tumne… oh chodo mujhe … aaahhh. Haaiiii… uiii… maaa…. Aahh… bas ab aur nahi ek minat ho gaya hai” usne mere sir ke baalo ko apne dono haathon me jor se pakad liya aur apni chhaati ki or dabaane lagi. Main kabhi ek uroj ko chusata kabhi dusare ko. Wo mast hui aankhen band kiye mere baalo ko jaor se kheenchate sitkaar kiye jaa rahi thi. Isi awastha me ham koi 8-10 minat to jaroor rahe honge. Achaanak usne mera sir pakad kar upar uthaaya aur mere hontho ko choomane lagi jaise wo kai janmo ki pyaasi thi. Ham dono french kiss karate rahe. Fir usne mujhe neeche dhakel diya aur mere upar let kar mere honth chusane lagi. Mera pappu to akad kar kutab meenaar bana paajaame me apna sir fod raha tah. Main uski peeth aur nitambon par haath fer raha tha. Kya mulaayam do kharbooje jaise nitamb kisi naamard ka bhi lund khada kar de. Maine uski gahari hoti khaai me apni anguliaan firaani suru kar di. Uski choot se risate kaamras se geeli uski choot aur gaand ka sparsh to aisa tha jaise main swarg me hi pahunch gaya hun.
Koi 5 minat tak to usne mere honth choose hi honge. Vaise hi jaise us black fox ne us 15-16 saal ke ladake ke choose the. Fir wo thodi si uthi aur mere seene par 3-4 mukke laga diye. Aur boli “Jijju tum ne aakhir mujhe kharaab kar hi diya na”
Maine dheere se kaha “kharaab nahi pyaar karana sikhaaya hai”
“Jijju tum ek nambar ke badmaas ho”
Maine apne man me kaha ‘meri raani main ek nambar ka nahi do nambar ka bhi badmaas hun thodi der baad pata chalega’ par maine kaha “Aare chhodo in baaton ko jawaani ka maja lo is raat ko yaadgaar raat banaao”
“Nahi jijju ye theek nahi hoga main abhi tak kanwaari hun maine pahale kisi ke saath kuchh nahi kiya mujhe dar lag raha hai koi gadbad ho gai to ?”
“Aare meri raani ab itani door aa hi gaye hai to dar kaisa tum to bekaar dar rahi ho sabhi maja lete hai. Is jawaani ko itana kyon tadafaa rahi ho. Apne man aur dil se poochho wo kya kahata hai.” maine apna raam baan chala diya. Main jaanaata tha wo poori tarah taiyyar hai par pahali baar hai is liye dar rahi hai man me hichkichat hai mere thode se saport se chudaai ke liye taiyyar ho jaayegi. Choot aur dil iske bas me ab kahaan hai wo to kab ke mere ho chuke hai. Bas ye jo deemag me thoda sa khalal hai mana kar raha hai. Mere project ka antim paart safalata poorvak poora ho gaya tah. Ab to bas products ka udaghaatan baaki tha.
Dosto ab Dilli lutane ko taiyyaar thi….
Maine uska top utaar diya. Dono kabutar aajad ho gaye. Wo aankhen band karke leti thi. Honth kaanp rahe the. Maine abhi tak uski choot ko haath bhi nahi lagaya tha. Aap to jaanate hai main Prem Guru hun aur jald baaji me viswaas nahi rakhata hun. Main to uske munh se kahalawaana chaahata tha ki ‘mujho chodo’. Ab maine uske honthon par apne honth rakh diye. Uske naram naajuk rasheele honth nahi jaise shahad se bhari phoolon ki pankhuriyaan ho. Maine uske gaalon par palakon par maathe par gale par kaan ki lob par dono urojon par aur naval (nabhi) par chummano ki jhadi ladi. Wo aah… unhhh… karati ja rahi thi. Apne pair patak rahi thi. Uski sitkaar tej hoti jaa rahi thi. Wo boli “Jijju mujhe ye kya hota ja raha hai…” wo romanch se kaanp rahi thi. Main jaanata tha uska chhota orgasm hone waala hai. Aare wo to bilkul kachhi kali hi nikali. Uska shareer akada aur usne mere honth hi kaat liye. Uske naakhun meri peeth par chubh rahe the. Usne ek halaki si kilkaari maari. Lagata hai uski choot ne paani chhod diya. Fir wo thandi pad gai.
Maine apne kapade utaar diye. Shirf chaddi pahane rakhi. Pappu maharaaj ne apna sir tight chaddi se baahar nikal hi liya. Us bechaare ka kya dos tha. Ab Nisha ki bel bottam hataane ka waqt aa gaya tha. Nisha aankhen band kiye leti thi. Maine uski salex (kotan ke paajaame jaisi) ke ilastik ko dheere dheere neeche karana shuroo kiya. (Usne fir laait band karane ko kaha to maine kaha are wo jangali billi aa gai to tumhaara doodh pi jaayegi aur main bhookha hi rah jaaunga rahane do.) Nisha ne apne nitamb thode se upar kar diye. Pyaaare paathako aur paathikaao ab to swarg ka dwaar bas ek do inch hi rah gaya tha. Choot ka anaavaran hone hi waala tha. Mera pappu tp thumke par thumka laga raha tha usne teen chaar tupke pree cum ke chhod hi diye. Wo to is swarg ke dwaar ke darshan ke liye kab ka betaab tha.
Pahale chhote chhote reshami baal (unhe jhaant to katai nahi kaha ja sakata) najar aaye aur fir kismis ka dana aur fir do bhaago me bati uski naajuk si makkhan malaai si choot ki faanke. Gulaabi rangat liye huye. Choot ke dono honthon par halake halake baal. Beech me halake saleti rang (halaka bhura) ki moti si daraar. Cheere ki lambaai 3 inch se jyaada katai nahi thi. Main daave ke saath kah sakata hun upar aur neeche ke dono honthon me rati bhar bhi fark nahi tha. Mote mote gulaabi rang ki santare ki faanke hon jaise. Daayeen jhaangh par wo hi kala til. Jaise mere katal ka poora intajaam kiye ho. Uski choot kaam ras se sarabor neem geelee thee. Maine apne haathon ki dono angulion se uski choot ki dono pankhudion ko hole se choda kiya. El halaki si ‘put’ ki aawaaj ke saath ek gahara sa cheera khul gaya.
Uff… surkh laal pakode jaisee choot ek dam gulaabi rang ki thi. Upar anaar dana uske neeche mutra chhed Maachis ki teeli ki nok jitana bada. Aiilaa…. iska fich… siiiiii… ka siskaara to kamaal ka hoga. Ek baar mootate hue jaroor chumma lunga. Mutra chhidra ke theek ek inch neeche swarg gufa ka chhota sa band dwaar jisame se halaka halaka sa safed paani jhar raha tha. Maine apnee jeebh jaise hi uski madan mani ke daane par rakhee to uski ek sitkar nikal gai. Maine jeebh so uske mutra chhidra par firaya aur fir uske swarg dwaar par. Kacche nariyal, peshaab aur paseene jaisi maadak sugandh mere nathuno me bhar gai. Kuch meetha, khatta namkeen sa swaad bhala main kaise nahi pahchaanata jaise Mikki hi mere saamane leti ho. Nisha to ab kilkaariyaan maarane lagi thi. Usne apne nitamb upar uthate hue apni choot mere munh se chipaka di. Mere sir ko dono haathon se jor se pakad liya aur jor se baal noch liye. Isame us bechaaree ka kya dos. Mujhe laga agar yahi haalaat rahe to main jaladi hi ganja ho jaaunga. Par agar aisee choot ke liye ganja bhi hona pade to koi gam nahi.
Usne uttejana me apne pair upar utha liye aur mere gale ke gird (chaaro or) lapet diye joron se. Maine uski poori ki poori choot ko apne munh me bhar liya thi bhi kitani badi ek chhoti parwal ya singhaade jitani to thi. Maine use jor se choosa to Nisha ne itani jor ki kilkaari maari hi agar baahar tej baaris aur bijali nahi kadak rahi hoti to jaroor padoshi sun hi lete. Uske saath hi uski choot ne koi 3-4 chammach sahad jaise meethe namkeen khatte nariyal paani aur pesaab ki mili juli sugandh jaise kaam ras ki chhod dee jis se mera munh laba lab bhar gaya. Sahi maayane me Nisha ka ye pahala orgasm tha. Main to use chatkhaare lekar pee hi gaya.
Dosto 2 products ki laanching safalata poorvak ho gai thi. Ab choot aur gaand ki chudaai tatha lund chusawaana baaki tha. Sabse pahale choot ki baari thee fir lund chusaai aur laast me gaand. Aaiye ab choot raani ka udghatan karate hai. Aap tayyar hai na. Mera pappu to mujhe aaj jinda nahi chhodega. Bahut tadfaaya hai is choot ne use. Poore 2 ghante se ek dam attenson hokar salaami maar raha hai. Nisha besudh si aankhen band kiye leti thi. Thodi der baad usne apni jaanghon ki kainchi dheelee ki aur mera sir pakad kar upar ki or sarkaya aur apne honth mere hontho par rakhkar choosane lagi. 2-3 minat choosane ke baad wo boli “Jijju mujhe pata nahi ye kya hota jaa raha hai. Ek madhoshi si chha rahi hai. Kuchh karo na… uf… hiiiii……” ek jor ki sitkaar usne lee. Lagata tha wo ek baar fir jhad gai.
Main uske upar aa gaya. Maine apni chaddi faad fainkee. Mera 7” ka pappu aaj to lohe ki tarah sakth tha. Uski lambaai adha inch badh kar 7.5 inch ho gai thi. Maine kaha “Kya karoo meri jaan ?”
“Oh… jijju… ab mat tarsaao… kar lo apne man ki. Oh aap mere munh se kya sunana chaahate hai. Mujhe sharm aati hai. Pleej….” Kuchh na kahate hue bhi usne sab kuch kah diya tha. Maine apne lund ko uski choot par laga diya.
“Uiiii….. maa……… oh… jijju wo.. wo .. nirodh (candom) to laga lo” Nisha ki aawaaj kaanp rahi thi.
“Meri raani nirodh se maja nahi aayega”
“Par wo .. wo.. main agar preganent ho gai to..?”
“Meri jaan fir tumhaara naya product kis din kaam aayega ? shirf ek mahine me ek goli ?” maine kaha. Saali mujhe papalu samajhati hai.
“Oh… jijju tum bhi ek nambar ke badmaas ho.. “ aur usne mujhe kas kar apni baahon me bhar liya.
“Nahi main to 2 nambar ka badmaas hun” maine kaha
“kya matalab ?”
“Wo baad me abhi to ek nambar ka hi maja lo” aur maine takiye ke neeche se vasalin ki dabbi se thodi si vasaline nikaali aur apne lund aur Nisha ki choot me ek anguli bhar kar gacch se daal di. Uski ek halaki si cheenkh nikal gai. Maine 3-7 baar anguli andar baahar ki. He bhagwaan saali ki kya mast taait choot hai. Ek dam kachhi kali jaisi fakt kunwaai kori rash malaai jaisi. Ab der karana theek nahi tha.
Maine apne pappu ko uski choot ke muhaane par rakha aur uski kamar ke neeche ek haath dala. Uske honthon ko apne munh me bhar liya aur fir ek hi jhatake me 3 inch lund andar thok diya. Nisha ki ghuti ghuti cheenkh nikal gai. Main to Prem Guru tha. Mujhe pata tha wo jaroor cheenkhegee isi liye maine uske dono honthon ko apne munh me le rakha tha. Aur uski kamar pakad rakhi thi taaki wo uchhal kar mera kaam kharab na kar de.
Abhi dhakke maarane ka samay nahi hua tah. Koi 2-3 minat ke baad jab uski choot kuchh rawaan hui aur usne paani chhoda tab maine hole hole dhakke lagaane shuroo kiye par abhi lund poora nahi ghusaaya. Mujhe pata tha abhi ek badha aur baaki hai- usaka hyman uski sheel uski naajuk jhilli kumaarichhad. Jiske fatane ka dard wo muskil se sahan kar paayegi. Par use bhi todana tha. Maine uske nitambon par haath ferana chaalu rakha. Uski gaand ke ched se jaise hi meri angulian takaraai to main to romanch se bhar utha. Baalon ki kanghi ke daante jaisi gaand ki teekhi nokdaar silwato waala chhed. Aaahhh…. Kya mast kayamat hai saali ki gaand ka chhed.
Aap chonk gaye na. Aap ne romantik kahaaniyon me jaroor suna hoga ki ladakion ki gaand ka chhed mulaayam hota hai. Agar koi aisa bolata hai to ya to wo jhoot bol raha hai ya fir wo gaand jaroor 15-20 baar lund khaa chuki hai. Guruji kahate hai ki kunwaari gaand ki pahachaan to uske ubharee huee silwato se hoti hai. Agar aap us lajjat ko mahsoos karana chaahate hai to ek santare ki faank lekar uski patali safed jhilli ko hata de. Ab uske joye najar aayegen. Apani aankhen band karke un par apni anguli feriye aap uski naajuki mahsoos kar lenge. He bhagwaan jis ladaki ne apni choot me bhi kabhi anguli na ki ho uski unchhui kori gaand maar kar to agar is duniya se jaana bhi pade to ye soda katai ghaate waala nahi hai. Aaj to is gaand ke chhed me apana ras bhar kar swarg ke is doosare darwaaje ka luft har keemat par uthaana hi hai. Par abhi to choot ki chudaai chal rahi hai. Gaand ki baat bad me. Pappu to is khayaal se hi adiyal tattu ban gaya hai. Pata nahi ye sabar karana kab seekhega. Usne do teen thumke choot ke andar lagaaye to Nisha ki choot ne bhi use kas kar andar bheench liya.
Maine uske nitambon ke neeche ek takiya aur laga diya aur apna ek haath uski patali kamar ke neeche daal kar pakad liya. Apne honth uske honthon par rakh kar unhe chooma aur fir dono honth apne munh me bhar liye. Wo to poori garam aur mast ho chuki thi. Usne to ab neeche se halake halake dhakke bhi lagaane shuroo kar diye the. Maine apna lund thoda sa baahar nikala aur ek jordaar dhakka laga diye. Dhakka itana jabardast tha ki uski seel ko todata hua gacch se jad tak uski choot me sama gaya. Nisha ki ghuti ghuti cheekh bahaar kadakati bijali ki aawaaj me dab gai. Wo dard ke maare chhatpataane lagi. Usne meri peeth par apne naakhoon itane jor se gadaaye ki meri peeth par bhi khoon chhalak aaya. Uski choot se khoon ka fawaara chhoota aur mere lund ko bhigota hua takiye par girane laga. Nisha ki kasmasaahat se uske honth mere munh se nikalate hi wo jor se cheenki “Oiiiiiii… maaa……….. mar.. gaiiiiiiiiii……..” aur uski aankhon se aansu nikalane lage.
Maine usse kaha “Bas meri raani ab dard khatam ab to bas aanand hi aanand hai. Bas ab chup karo” maine uske namkeen swaad waale aansuon par apni jeebh rakh dee. “Jijju aap bhi ek nambar ke kasaai ho mujhe maar hi dala oiii…. nikaalo bahaar main mar jaaungi… uiiii maaa…..” wo roye ja rahi thi. Main jaanata tha ye dard 3-4 minat ka hai baad me to bas maje hi maje. Mera pappu to jaise nihaal hi ho gaya. Itani taait choot to Madhu ki bhi nahi lagi thi suhaagraat me.
Koi 5 minat ke baad Nisha kuchh normal hui. Uski choot ne bhi fir se ras chhodana chaalu kar diya. Maine uski kapolo, honthon aur maathe par chumman lene shuroo kar diye. Fir maine usse poochha “Kyon meri maina ab dard kaisa hai” to wo boli “Jijju aap ne to meri jaan hi nikaal di koi kunwaari ladaki ko aise chodata hai ?”
“Dekho ab jo hona tha ho gaya hai, Ab to bas iske aage swarg ka sa aanand hi aanand hai” aur maine hole hole dhakke lagane shuroo kar diye. Nisha ko bhi ab thoda thoda maja aane laga tha. Maine kaha “Meri Maina ab tum kali se phool ban gai ho aur main tumhaara Mitthu”
Nisha ki hansi nikal padi aur usne 2-3 mukke meri peeth par lagaate hue kaha “Tum poore ek nambar ke badmaas ho. Apne sabd jaal me fassa kar mujhe aakhir kharaab kar hi diya” Maine ek dhakka aur lagaya to wo chihunki “Oiiiii…. aah… yaa…. Oh ab ruko mat aise hi dhakke lagaao aahhh… ya…. Oiii… main to gaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii…..” aur uske saath hi wo ek baar fir jhad gai. Main to jaise swarg me tha. Maine lagataar 8-10 dhakke aur laga diye. Ab to uski choot se fachh fachh ka madhur sangeet bajane laga tha.
Ye silsila koi 20 minat to jaroor chala hoga. Mera pappu bechaara kab tak ladata. Aakhir usko bhi shaheed hona hi tha. Maine danadan 5-7 dhakke aur laga diye. Nisha bhi fir jhadane ke kagaar par hi to thi. Aur fir… ek. do teen chaar paanch….. pata nahi kitani pichkaariyaan mere pappu ne chhod di…………. Nisha ne mujhe kas kar pakad liya aur uski choot ne bhi kaam raj chhod diya. Uski baahon me lipata main koi 10 minat uske upar hi pada raha.
10 minat ke baad Nisha jaise neend se jaagi. Main uth kar baith gaya. Nisha bhi meri or sarak aai. Usne mere honthon par do teen chumman le liye. Maine us se thank you kaha to usne kaha “Gande bacche mere pyaare Mitthu…” aur meri naak pakad kar jor se daba di. Mere teesare product ki laanching ki ye badhaai hi to thi.
Main use god me utha kar baathroom ki or le jaane laga. Usne apne baahen mere gale me daal di aur aankhen band kar lee. Maine dekha poora takiya mere veerya Nisha ke khoon aur kaam raj se bheega hua tha. Maine ek haath se us takiye ko ulata diya taaki Nisha itana khoon dekhkar dar na jaaye.
Nisha pot par baith kar pesaab karane lagi. Ahhh… fich.. siiii….. ka wo siskara aur moot ki patali dhaar to Mikki jaisee hi thi. Main to mantra mugdh sa bas us najaare ko dekhata hi rah gaya. Pot par baithi Nisha ki choot to aise lag rahi thi jaise kisi ne mote sabdo me angaregi me ‘W’ (dabalu) likh diya ho. Uski choot aise lag rahi thi jaise ek chhota karela kisi chheel kar beech me se cheer diya ho. Choot ke honth soojkar pakode jaise ho gaye the. Bilkul laal gulaabi. Uski gaand ka bhura aur kathai rang ka chhota sa chhed khul aur band ho raha tha. Mujhe apne chothe product ki yaad aa gai… aare bhai lund bhi to chuwaana tha na. Maine usse kaha ek minat ruko mootana band karo aur utho … pleej jaladi”
“kya hua ?” Nisha ne mootana band kar diya aur ghabraa kar beech me hi khadi ho gai. Maine use apani or kheencha. Main ghutano ke bal baith gaya aur uski choot ko dono haathon se khol kar uski madan mani ke daane ko choosane laga. Wo to aah.. uhh karati hi rah gai. Usne kaha “Oh kya kar rahe ho jijju off… ise saaf to do. Oh gande bacche oiii… maaa….”
Yahi to main chaahata tha. Main jaan bujh kar uski veerya aur kaam raj se bhari choot ko choos kar ye dikhaana chaahata tha ki chudaai me kuch bhi ganda nahi hota taaki wo mera lund choosane me koi kotaahi na barate aur koi aanaakaani na kare. “aare pyaar me kuchh ganda nahi hota” maine kaha. Aur fir uske kismis ke daane ko choosane laga.
Nisha kitani der bardast kar paati. Uski choot ke mutra chhidra se halaki si peshaab ki dhaar fir chaalu ho gai jo meri thodi se hoti hui gale ke neeche gir seene se hoti mere pappu aur andon ko jaise dhoti ja rahi thi. Usne mere sir ke baal pakad liye kaskar. Main to mast ho gaya. Jab uska pesaab band hua to usne neeche jhuk kar mere honth choom liye aur apne hontho par jeebh firaane lagi. Use bhi apne moot ka thoda sa namkeen swaad jaroor mil hi gaya.
Hamane halaka sa shaawar liya aur saaf safaai ke baad fir bed par aa gaye. Main bed par tek laga kar baith gaya. Nisha achaanak uchhali aur mujhe ek taraf ludhakaate hue mere pet par baith gai. Uski dono taange mere pet ke dono taraf thi aur uske ghutane mude the. Usne apne honth mere honthon par rakh kar do teen chumman tada tad le liye. Uske sinduri aam mere seene se lage the aur uske nitambon ke neeche mera pappu pis rahe tha. Wo apni choot aur nitambon ko bhi thoda thoda sa ghis rahi thi. Aisa karte hue usne apni jeebh ki nok se meri naak chaati aur uski nok apne munh me lekar chusane lagi. Aaaiiiiilaaa…. Main to mast hi ho gaya.
Pyaare dosto aap soch rahe honge isame mast hone waali kya baat hai. Naak honth gaal to har ladaki choos hi leti hai. Aap galat soch rahe hai. Shaayad aap aurton ki is ada ko nahi jaanate. Meri pyaari paathikaayen jaroor hans rahi hai. Wo achhi taarah is ka matalab jaanati hai. Nahi samajhe na ? chalo main bata deta hun…
Is baat se to aap ittefaak (sahmat) rakhate hain na ki jab koi ladaka ya aadami kisi ladaki ya aurat ko kahata hai ki tum bahut khoobshurat ho to isaka matalab saaf hota hai ki wo use chodana chaahata hai. Dusari baat jab aadami kisi ladaki ke honth choosata hai to wo man me soch raha hota hai ki ye uski choot waale honth hi hai. Aur isi tarah jab koi ladaki kisi aadami ka naak choos rahi hoti hai to anjaane me usaka lund hi choos rahi hai. Thoda sa sabra rakhiye abhi pata chal jaayega.
“Nisha ek baat batana to main bhool hi gaya” maine kaha
“Unh.. ab kuch mat bolo bas mujhe pyaar karane do apne Mitthu ko.” usne fir mere honthon ko choom liya.
“Aadami ke lund ki lambaai bina naape pata karani ho to kaise pata karenge ?”
“Kaise… kya matalab ?”
“Aadami ki naak ki lambaai se 3 guna bada uska lund hota hai” maine kaha to hairaani se wo mera naak dekhane lagi “Oh… no…”
“Naap kar dekh lo” wo mera naak chumana chhod kar ek or ho gai aur main baith gaya. Ab usne mere pappu ki or dekha aur haath me lekar use masalane lagi. Pappu to bas isi intajaar me tha. Usne fir thumke lagaane chaalu kar diye. Dosto ab lund chusawaane ki baari thi. Main jaanata hun pahali baar lund chusane me har ladaki nakhere karati hai aur use ganda kaam samajhati hai. Par main bhi Prem Guru aise hi nahi bana hun. Maine bhi perfect planning ki thi is product ke laanching ki.
Maine us se kaha “Meri Maina main ek baar tumhaari munia ko choosana chahata hun. Bhala use kya aitaraaj ho sakata tha. Main let gaya aur uske pair apne sir ke dono or kar diye jis se uski choot mere munh ke theek upar aa gai. Ham dono ab 69 ki pojison me the. Nisha mere upar jo thi. Mera pappu theek uske munh ke saamane tha. Maine jhat se choot ki pankhudion ko choda kiya aur gapp se apni jeebh us gulaabi khaai me utaar dee. Uttejana me uska shareer kaampane laga. Maine uski choot ko jor jor se choosana chaalu kar diya, Ab us ke paas mere lund ko choosane ke alaawa kya raasta bacha tha. Usne pahale mere pappu ke supaare ko chuma aur uspar aaye pre cum ko test kiya aur fir gapp se use munh me bhar kar choosane lagi. Aah… uska naram geela aur thoda kunkuna (garam) ahasaas mujhe mast kar gaya. Mera pappu to nihaal hi ho gaya. Maine apni jeebh uski gaand ke bhoore chhed par bhi firaani chaalu kar di. Mujhe apana paanchawa producto bhi to laanch karana tha. Aare bhai gaand bhi maarani thi na. Uske liye Nisha ko tayyar karana sab se muskil kaam tha. Maine 4-5 baar apni jeebh uski gaand par firaai to wo ek kilkaari maarate hue fir jhad gai. Main apna veerya uske munh me abhi nahi chhodana chaahata tha. Mujhe to pahale uski gaand ka udaghaatan karana tha. Aur fir jaisa maine socha tha wohi hua.
Nisha jor jor ki saanse leti hui ek or ludhak gai. Uske uroj saanso ke saath upar neeche ho rahe the. Aankhen band thi. Achaanak wo uthi aur mere uapar aa kar mujhe kas kar apani baahon me kjakad liya. Maine apani anguli uski gaand ke chhed par firaani suru jar di. Uff… kya khurdara sa ahasaas tha. Wo to bas aankhe band kiye mujhse chipaki padi thi. Maine hole se uske honthon par ek chumman liya aur kaha “Meri raat kali meri Maina kya hua ?”
“Bas ab kuchh mat bolo ek baar mujhe fir se….” aur usne mujhe choom liya.
“Nisha ek aur maja logi ?”
“Kya matalab” usne chonkate hue meri or dekha.
“Main aur Madhu swarg ke doosare dwaar ka bhi khoob maja lete hai “
“Kya matalab… wo.. wo … oh… no… nahi ….” wo to aise bidaki jaise kisi kaali chhatari ko dekh kar bhains bidakati hai “Oh jijju tumhara dimaag to theek hai na.. kya baat kar rahe ho ?”
“Aare meri maina raani aurat ke teen chhed hote hai aur teeno me hi chudaai ki jaati hai. Chudaai ka asali aanand to is dwaar me hi hai. Ek baar maja le kar to dekho fir to roj yahi kahogi ki apana pen draaive agale chhed me nahi mere pichhale chhed me hi daalo”
“Nahi aap jhoot bol rahe hai. Bhala koi isame karata hai ?”
“Aare isame jhoot waali kya baat hai. Madhu to isaki deewaani hai. Ham to har saniwaar ko iska maja lete hai”
“Oh… ab main samajhi Madhu didi Sunday ko thodi taange chodi karke … oh… iiissss……………..” jis tarah se Nisha sarmaai thi mai to mar hi mita uski is ada par. Chidia fas jaayegi.
“Dekho ab tak maine jitani bhi baate tumhe bataai hai kya koi bhi baat galat nikali ?”
“Par wo.. wo..itana mota mere chhote se chhed me… oh no mujhe dar lagata hai” wo kuch soch nahi pa rahi thi.
“Achha chalo ek totaka tumhe dikhata hun. Agar tumhe sahi lage to theek nahi to koi baat nahi gaand maarana cancil” maine kaha
“Wo kya hai ?”
Dosto ab to Bharatpur lutane ko tayaar hone hi waala hai. Bas 2 minat ki aur deri hai. Maine us se kaha ki tum ukadu baith jaao. Wo baith gai. Ab maine takiye ke neeche se boroleen ki tub nikaali aur uski anguli par ek matar ke daane jitani creem laga di. Fir us se kaha ki tum ise apni muniya ki padosan (gaand par yaar) laga lo. Usne aisa hi kiya. Ab maine us se kaha ki khadi ho jaao. Wo khadi ho gai. Fir maine use baith jaane ko kaha aur ek chhota sa sheesa jo maine uske Lap Top waale beg se nikaala tha uski gaand ke neeche rakh diya aur kaha ki is sheeshe me apani raani ki shakal dekho jitani door tak creen fail gai hai agar lund ki motaai us ghere jitani ya kam hai to gaand raani ko koi paresaani nahi hogi. Creem ka ghera iodex ki sheeshi ke dhakkan ke jitana tha. Mera lund bhi kamo bes utana hi mota to hai.
Use to jaise viswaas hi nahi ho raja tah. “Par wo… wo… nahi mujhe bahut dar lag raha hai. Suna hai isame karane se bahut dard hota hai”
“Achha chalo tumhe dard hoga to nahi karenge. Ek baar traai karane me kya harj hai”
“Par wo .. wo jyaada dard to nahi hoga na kahin… ?” wo kuchh hichkicha rahi thi. Par mera flow chaart aur prograaming to bilkul pakki thi. Ab bachaana kahaan sambhav tha.
Maine use karwat lekar so jaane ko kaha. Wo baayee karvat ke bal let gai aur apni daayee taang ko sikod kar apne seene ki or kar liya. Saayad aap soch rahe honge ‘gaand maarane ka ye kaun sa aasan hua. Gaand to doggy ya cat style me hi achhi tarah maari jaa sakati hai ?’
Aap galat soch rahe hai. Lagata hai aapane gaand na to marwaai hai aur na hi maari hai. Pahali gaand chudaai badi hi saavdhaani se ki jaati hai. Pahali gaand chudaai me ladaki ko jyaada dard nahi hona chaahiye nahi to baad me ladaki kabhi gaand nahi marwaayegi. Ab main ghutane modakar uski baayee jaangh par baith gaya is se jab main uski gaand me lund daalunga to wo aage nahi khisak paayegi. Doggy ya ghodi style me yahi to muskil hoti hai jab bhi aap dhakka lagaayege to ladaki aage ho jaayegi aur lund uski gaand se fisal jaayega. 5-7 dhakko ke baad aap baahar hi khallas ho jaayenge.
Ab maine boroleen ki tub nikaali aur topi khol kar uska munh uski gaand ke sunhari chhed par laga kar thoda sa andar kiya. Pahale se thodi boroleen lagi hone se tub ki nob andar chali gai. Ab maine us tub ko jor se bheench diya. “Uiiii… jijju gudgudi ho rahi hai” Nisha thoda sa chihunki. Wo aage to sarak hi nahi sakati thi. Maine aadhi se jyaada tub uski gaand me khaali kar dee. Ab dheere dheere maine uski gaand ke chhed par masaaj karani shuroo kar dee. Boroleen andar pinghalane lagi thi. Aur meri anguli uski gaand ke tight chhed hone ke baavjood bhi aaram se andar jaane lagi thi pyaar se dheere dheere. Mujhe is kaam me koi jaladi nahi karani thi. Main to gaand maarane ka pakka khilaadi hun. Nisha aah unh karane lagi. Koi 4-5 miant ki ghisaai aur angulbaaji se uski gaand rawaan ho gai thi. “Oh… jijju ab daal do”
Shaabas meri Maina yahi to main chaahata tha. Ab maine vasaleen ki dabbi uthaai aur lagbhag aadhi shishi creem apne pappu par laga li. Aapko to pata hai mera supada aage se thoda patala hai. Gaand maarane ke liye ati uttam. Maine supaade ko uski gaand par laga diya. Aah… kya mast chhed tha. Do gol pahaadion ke beech ek chhoti si gufa jiska darwaaja kabhi band kabhi khul raha tha. Nisha aah… unh…. oh… uiii… kiye jaa rahi thi.
Dosto aur dostaanio ab mere paanchave aur antim product ki laanching thi. Agar aap ko thoda bahut gaandbaaji ka shauk aur anubhav ho to aap jaroor jaanate honge ki sabase kathin kaam gaand ke chhalle (Anal ring) ko paar karana hota hai. Ek baar agar supaada us chhalle ko paar kar gaya to samajho killa fateh ho gaya. Andar to bas gubbaare ki tarah khaali kuaa hota hai. Aap ko bata dun lund chaahe jitana bhi bada kyon na ho gaand me jad tak chaala jaayega bas chhed ka ghera (Anal ring) ek baar paar hona chaahiye.
Aap soch rahe hone yaar ek dhakka lagaao aur thok do killa kyon tadafa rahe ho apne lund aur bechaari gaand ko. Kaheen aap ka bhi khada to nahi ho gaya ya fir meri pyaari paathikaao ne apni munia me angul karani to suru nahi kar dee ? Mujhe pakka yakeen hai aap ki penti jaroor geelee ho gai hai. Chaaho to dekh lo.
Maine ek anguli uski choot me daal kar andar bahaar karani shuroo kar di aur ek hath se uske nippals masalane shuroo kar diye. Uska ek baar aur jhadana jaroori tha taaki gaand ke chhed ko paar karwaane me use kam se kam dard ho. 3-4 minat ki angulbaajee aur chunchiyon ko masalane se wo uttejit ho gai. Uska shareer thoda sa akadane laga aur wo uiii… maaa… oh… yaa… karane lagi. Uski choot ne paani chhod diya. Maine apni anguli nikaali aur apne munh me daal kar ek chatkhara liya. Fir maine dubaara anguli uski choot me daali aur use bhi choot ras chataaya. Nisha to mast hi ho gai. Uski gaand ka chhed jor jor se khulane aur band hone laga tha. Yahi samay tha swarg ke doosare dwaar ko paar karaane ka. Jaise uski gaand khulati mera supada thoda sa andar sarak jaata. Ab tak uski gaand ka chhed 5 rupay ke sikke jitana khul chuka tha aur lagbhag pon inch supada andar ja chuka tha safalata poorvak bina kisi dard ke. Maine uski kamar ko jor se pakada aur jor se (dhakka nahi yaar) dabaav daalana chaalu kiya. (Murgi ko halaal kiya jata hai jhataka nahi) Gaand andar se chikani thi aur Nisha mast thi. Gachh se 3 inch lund ghus gaya aur is se pahale ki Nisha ki cheenkh hawa me gunje maine uska munh apne daaye haath se dhak diya. Wo thoda sa kasmasaai aur gun gun karane lagi. Main shaant raha. Mera 3 inch lund andar jaa chuka tha. Ab fisal kar baahar nahi aa sakata tha. Mujhe dar tha ki choot ki tarah gaand se khoon na nikalane lage. Lekin boroleen aur vasaleen ki chikanaai se uski gaand fatane se bach gai thi. Iska ek kaaran aur bhi tha maine lund andar daalate samay kewal dabaav hi diya tha dhakka nahi maara tha.
2-3 minat aah… unh… ke baad baad Nisha shaant ho gai. Maine apna haath hata liya to wo boli “Mujhe to maar hi dala”
“Aare meri Maina ab dekhana tum apne munh se kahogi aur jor se thoko aur jor se”
“Hato gande bacche”
Ab dheere dheere dhakke lagaane ka samay aa gaya tha. Maine apna lund andar baahar karana shuru jkar diya. Nisha ne apne gaand ka chhed sikodane ki kosis ki to maine use samajhaaya ki wo katai aisa na kare. Maine use bataaya ki agar usane gaand ko sikoda to andar lund aur supaada dono fool jaayega aur use jyaada takaleef hogi. Dosto aapko pata hoga ki gaand marwaate samay agar ladaki apni gaand ko andar ki or sikod le jaise moot rokane ke liye kiya jaata hai to lund aur supaada andar fool jaata hai aur fir mote lund se gaand fatane ko koi nahi rok paayega.
Maine apna lund jad tak andar kar diya. Nisha to mast ho gai. Wo to bas uiii… maaa… hi karati ja rahi thi, Meeti si sitkar. Main apne lund andar baahar karata ja raha tha. Vaise poocho to gaand ka asali maja to bas 3-4 inch tak hi hota hai uske aage to pata hi nahi chalata aage to kua hi hota hai. Nisha ab pet ke bal ho gai thi usane apne dono pair chode kar diye aur nitamb upar utha diye. Mera lund uski gaand me taait ho gaya par chikanaai ke kaaran andar baahar hone me koi dikkat nahi thi. Har dhakke ke saath Nisha ki sitkaar nikal jati aur wo apne nitamb aur upar kar deti. Saali pahali gaand chudaai me hi itani mast ho gai maine to sapane me bhi nahi socha tha ki itani jabadast gaand hogi. Aisa nahi tha ki main bas dhalkke hi laga raha tha main to uski choot me bhi angul kar raha tha, Kabhi uski peeth chumata kabhi uske kaan ki lob kaat leta. Wo takiye se sir lagaaye aaram se apne nitamb uapr neeche karati hui oiiii aaah… yaaa…. kar rahi thi.
Maine 15-20 aurton ki gaand to jaroor maari hogi par Nisha jaisi gaand to kisi ki bhi nahi thi. Madhu ki gaand bhi jab maine pahali baar maari thi to wo to behos si hi ho gai thi par meri ye maina to sabse mast nikali. Main Mikki ki gaand nahi maar paya tha par mera anumaan hai ki Nisha ki gaand Mikki se kisi bhi haalat me kamtar nahi hai. Koi 20-25 minat ki gaand chudaai ke baad mujhe laga ki ab manjil najdeek aane waali hai to maine Nisha se kaha “Meri Maina tota ab udane waala hai”
Nisha hansane lagi “Abhi nahi ek baar mujhe doggy style me karake bhi karo”
Aur fir wo apne ghutano ke bal ho gai. Main samajh gaya saali gori firangan aur Black Fox waali blu film ki tarah chudawaana chaahati hai. Maine usaki kamar pakadi aur lund andar daal kar dhakke lagaane shuroo kar diye. Uski gaand ka chhalla aise lag raha tha jaise kisi chhoti bachhi ke haath me pahanane waali laal rang ki choodi (bangal) ho ya ek patali si gol laal rang ki tub laait ho jo jal aur bujh rahi ho. Anal ring aise hi andar baahar ho rahi thi. Usne apna sir takiye se laga liya aur mere andon ko jor se apni mutthi me lekar dabaane lagi. Mere 8-10 dhakko aur choot me angulbaaji ke kaaran Nisha ki choot ne paani chhod diya aur usne ek meeti si sitkar lekar apni gaand sikodi. Isake saath hi mere lund ne bhi 7-8 pichkaariaan uski gaand me chhod di. Usaki gaand mere garam aur gaadhe veerya se labalab bhar gai. Jaise jaise mere dhakko ki raftar kam hoti gai wo neeche hoti gai aur main fir uske upar letata chala gaya. Maine use baahon me bhar rakha tha. Uske dono uroj mere haathon me the.
Koi 10 minat tak aankhen band kiye ham log aise hi pade rahe. Fir Nisha uth khadi hui. Wo langadaati si baathroom ki or jaane lagi to maine usaka haath pakad kar fir apni god me baitha liya. “Oh saara paani meri jaanghon par failata ja raha hai mujhe gudgudi ho rahi hai oh.. chhodo saaf to karane do”
Par maine use nahi jaane diya. Maine takiye ke neeche se nepkin (chhota toliya) nikaala aur Nisha ki chooti (risati) gaand ko saaf kar diya. Uski gaad ka chhed ab bilkul laal hokar 5 rupay ke sikke jitana choda ho gaya thaa. Chhed ki sakal angareji ke “O” jaisee ho gai thi. Maine fir usaka sir pakad kar uske hontho ka ek chumma le liya. “Thank you meri Maina”
“Oh…. Thank you mere Mitthu” usane bhi mujhe choom liya. Wo bed par ukadoo baithi apni choot aur gaand ke chhed ko dekh rahi thi. Usne kaha “Dekho meri munia aur uski sautan ka kya haal kar diya hai tumne”
Uski choot sooj kar laal ho gai thi aur gaand ka rang bhi bhoore se laal ho gaya tha. Uski choot to aise lag rahi thi jaise kisi ne chhoti si parwal ko beech me se cheer kar choda kar diya ho. Uski daraar to aise lag rahi thi jaise kisi nav vivaahita ne apni moti si maang bhar rakhhi ho bilkul laal surkh. Fir maine kaha “are isaki sundarata to aur bhi badh gai hai waah kitani pyaari lag rahi hai. Keshar kyaari ke beech jaise gulaab ka khila hua phool ho jaise. Pleej ek chumma lene do na” main uski or badha to wo peeche sarakti hui boli “Hato matalabi kahin ke aurton ki bhawnaaon ka tumhe kya pata”
“Kyon kya hua meri maina ?”
“Aapne apani manmarji aakhir kar hi li na ab jhootha pyaar dikha rahe ho”
“Wo kaise ?”
“Aise to bade Mitthu bane firate the Madhu didi ke ?”
“Oh… wo…” meri hansi chhoot gai. ‘Meri raat kali tum ham bhanwaron ki kaifiyat (aadat) kya jaano kabhi ek phool par chipak kar nahi baithate.’ Par maine kaha “wo to main ab bhi uska Mitthu hun”
“Main bhi yahi dekhana chaahati thi us Ekata kapoor ko yahi to dikhana tha ki ye Mitthu meeyaan unpar kitana lattu hai. Mere man me bhi use neecha dikhaane ki kaheen na kaheen iichha thi. Shuroo shuroo me to main tumhe nira Lallu hi samajh baithi thi par tum to bade kalakaar nikale” usne kaha
“Oh chhoda in neeche upar ki baaton ko dekho mera pappu tumahaare liye kaise tadaf raha hai” mere sher ne fir se thumke lagaane shuru kar diye the. Main ek baar usaki gaand aur maarana chaahata tha. Maine jab aage badh kar use baahon me lena chaaha to wo boli “Thaharo”
“Kya hua ?”
“Nahi is baar main upar aaungi………..” aur isase pahale ki main kuchh samajhata usne mujhe ek dhakka diya aur uchhal kar mere pet ke upar baith gai. Mujhe baad me samajh aaya ki wo baar baar aisa kyon kar rahi hai. Darashal usne blu film me Aunty (black fox) ko us ladake ke upar aakar chodate hue dekha tha saali usi aasan me mujh se bhi chudawaana chaahati thi. Koi baat nahi chaaku kharbooj par gire ya kharbooja chaaku par pade katana to kharbooje ko hai na. Mera matalab hai chudana to choot ya gaand ko hi hai na. Kya fark padata hai. Mera pappu bhala aisa mauka kyon chhodata. Wo to fir tayyar ho chuka tha aur uski gaand par thokar laga raha tha. Usne ek haath peechhe kiya thodi si upar uthi aur mere lund ko apni choot ke munh par laga kar gachh se neeche baith gai. Mera lund ek hi jhatake me jad tak uski choot me sama gaya. Uske munh se jor ki sitkaar nikali “Oiiii… maaa…….” Usane apne honth mere honthon par rakh diye. Maine unhe choom liya. Ab maine apne ek haath se uski kamar ko pakada aur doosare haath ki anguli se uski gaand ka chhed tatola. Ek hi chudaai me wo dheela ho gaya tha. Maine gachh se apne tarjani anguli jad tak uski gaand me thok di. Nisha jor se cheekhi ……….
“oiii maa… kya karato ho… oh jijju tum bhi ek nambar…. Oh no tum pakke do nambar ke badmaas ho” aur usne mere honth itane jor se kaate ki unse khoon hi nikalane laga. Par mujhe usaka koi dard ya gam nahi tha. Baahar paani barasana band ho gaya tha par hamaare andar ubalata paani (Laawa) to band hone ka naam hi nahi le raha tha.
Dosto ab mutth maarana band karo aare bahi aaj raat ke liye kuchh to bacha kar rakho kya aap ko aaj gaand nahi maarani ? Aur meri pyaari paathikaao aap bhi apni geeli penti me anguli karana chhodo aur aaj raat ki taiyyari karo. Agar koi boy friend nahi hai to mujhe mail karo : premguru2u@yahoo.com ; premguru2u@rediffmail.com
Thanks & love. Aapka Prem Guru.
